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January 2009

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Somethings Gotta Change.

So I was having peanut butter
capn crunch for dinner the other night.
(Which is thee best cereal of all time, in case you didn't know)
And my dad's all "That's not wht you should be eating if you want
to lose weight..blah blah blah"
And whatever.
He got me so mad, I went upstairs weighed myself, and nearly
stuck a toothbrush down my throat, and then put lots of clothes on
so that when I went on the treadmill I would sweat and sweat and sweat.
Burning off all the calories.
Sometimes all I want to do is make myself throw up, because its
easier than excerising. I mean I eat wayy healthy, I have salads nearly
every day for lunch...

What I'm saying is things are hard in life.
Bu that's the way their supposed to be,
because otherwise we wouldn't learn 
from our mistakes. And ik this is hard for me
because I want it so bad, so me wanting it so bad
is making me impatient and wanting it sooner.

I'm sick of being jealous of my sister.
In case you havent ever seen her she weighs 73 lbs,
and is almost 13.  And no nothing is wrong with her thats just her.
She just got the Mom genes, because my mom is thinnnn!
I got my dad's man arms, and such.

The ONLY, ONLY thing I want in life right now is
to be comfortable being myself, and the ONLY
I can achieve that is by becoming thinner.
Thats the only way.